If you haven't yet seen the artistic talent that has been displayed in the front window at Mercury on Main st, quite frankly I feel sorry for you. Young Matt drew a spectacular killer snowman destroying a city early this month, and then after someone washed the window for no good reason, I replaced it with a delightful array of mystical creatures and magical scenery. If you haven't met me, my name is Tina and I started working at Merc about 3 weeks ago. ANYWAYS,
I got thinking on this dreary Tuesday afternoon as I was looking at the window, that not only am I an exceptional artist, but seeing as halloween is creeping up, I could also kick Matt Davey's ass in a pumpkin carving competition. So Matt listen up, I challenge you to a jack o lantern comp. If you accept we can make further arrangements regarding a time and place, as well as who should judge. I will be awaiting your reply.
Sincerely,
Tina

i'm MAINly excited to tell y'alllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll bout dis here cofffeeee!!
i just indulged myself in a delectable press ^.^

ETHIOPIAN SIDAMO!!!! TRABOCCA NATURAL!
in short:




so let's do some mathematics...

trabocca + KAYdence =

Hey guess what. Now this is happening:

I especially like the one that says "METAL" in the bottom right hand corner. OH YEAH, I guess I should inform you what I meant by saying "now this is happening."

WE HAVE A CASSETTE DECK!!!!!

TAPES ARE ALIVE. FORGET ALL YOU NAYSAYERS. The technology is far from dead! We're going to be playing a lot more tapes from now on SO GET USED TO IT, OR ELSE! K BUDDY? GOOD. COME GET COFFEE NOW, TOO, OR ELSE I WILL PERSONALLY COME TO YOUR HOME AND THEN TAKE YOUR LITTLE DOG FOR A WALK, NEVER TO RETURN. YOU'LL MISS IT. I PROMISE. YOU'LL BE FEELING ALL KINDS OF MELANCHOLY. IT'LL JUST BE TERRIBLE!!!!!!


-MATT
OH YEAH, ONLY AT MERCURY ON QUEEN STREET, BY THE WAY.

A nice pair.

A Berg pair.

The hot pair.

The pair.

Gee golly. So many durnned jokes to make with pairs. So little blogging time. I went the cop out route of just googleing these images but what the hey, it's cloudy out and I don't feel 100%.

What is, however, 100% good is the pairing of Ethiopia Washed Yirgacheffe and one of our all-spice brownies. To get the full (100%) effect the coffee must be taken (100%) pure and untainted. That way, hopefully, you'll be able to taste the sweet fruity (dates? strawberries?) notes, and it's clean balanced finish. Take a bite of the all-spice brownie right after and you've got a party in your mouth, much like the one we'll have for Bergie when she gets back.

Clothing optional of course.

a

Greetings from the future.
Right now its 12 30 Toronto time... But its 6 30 in the future! the Berlin future that is. Good time for a coffee i bet. I myself have had a coffee...a whole pot. Well really two pots...but whos counting? Sorry to disapoint, but the future isnt all its cracked up to be. No sexy robots to do your dishes (just sexy bergs). No space age silver suits...unless you count the outfit i had on last night...
Well count it down cause Miss Alice Berg has to be making her way back to the Big Smoke pretty soon. Hitting of Leipzig and frankfurt and then...you got it...Mercury!!

what!?!

man, I was going to post a photo to sum up my trip...but it wont let me. figures. well you just have to imagine what it looks like yourself.
and yes Tran...i am wearing clothes!
over and out Merc-ers

Everyone knows about the cat poop coffee, right? It's really expensive, and it's made from the coffee beans that a bunch of cats in some village eat and then poop out so when you drink it, it's all been digested and stuff.





We don't carry that. That sounds gross.




BUT we DO have, this week, super-special-like, some of 49th Parallel's India Devon Estate, which is actually picked and eaten by Rhesus monkeys. See, they love the little cherries (see fig. 1)

figure one: nom nom nom nom nom

that the beans are actually the seeds of, and so they pick them, at the height of their ripeness, eat the fruit, and spit out the beans. It's nature's quality control. Like how they say on TV, "picked at the perfect point of ripeness"? Except that the guys on TV are obviously lying. If they wanted to get perfectly ripe fruit, they'd have to hire monkeys. (see figure 2)

figure two: duck, you sucker.

Anyways it's a beautiful coffee, with a nutty aroma and a sweet chocolate-y, hazelnut-y finish. Try it in a press!

And while we're at it, we really should mention that we've got the #2 coffee in the whole wide world right now, Nicaragua's Limoncillo. We've already sold out on half-pound bags (which were $35 for the half-pound, if that kind of stuff impresses you) (see fig. 3)

figure three: blangin'

but you can still get a tasty taste in a press in store! It's a remarkably full-bodied coffee that still retains delicate notes of jasmine and citrus, with a creamy finish. It's like a tasty truffle, but not one that pigs hunt for. But wouldn't that make an awesome end to this blog post? All come full circle, from animals making poo coffee to coffee that would taste great to animals that smell like poo? How much can I talk about excrement and still keep my job?

And now....here's my long overdue answer to my previous post's question:

It...

Was...

The...

Amount...

Of...

PRECIPITATION!!!!! (So far this summer, and that was back in August or something).

Congratulations to all who participated, you will all receive a complimentary "Participants' Ribbon"!

Thanks for playing. Drink coffee. Often.

Forever yours,
Neil "Stankin" Rankin.