Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Hello everyone. Here are our Holiday Hours:

Dec.31st :6:30a-5p,

Happy Holidays! and a Happy New Years.
Thanks again for being so amazing!

Sunday, December 06, 2009

some of you may or may not have noticed that it is in fact december.

actually, matt taylor has yet to notice, because he is still sporting his trusty movember stache. i can't bring myself to tell him because, well, because i'm new here, and also because i don't think he would part with it anyways.

but, and so, it's obvious that as head of the mario kart family, matt actually needs to have a mustache and i think he's just finally realized this so that's okay.

matt taylor

and, also, his brother luigi has obviously also not realized that it's december, and this too is okay, because luigi is supposed to have a mustache as well.

neil rankin

so, actually, the whole movember thing was just a ruse for their true personalities to have an opportunity to come out. and for everyone's true mario personalities to come out, i've noticed.

doug tiller

matt davey





chris swimms

i don't have a character yet because i haven't advanced to the next level. next month if i'm lucky.

but so in case you forgot again, it's december, so here's a list of reasonable things to do with all yr time:
1. skating (hot chocolate necessity both before and after, or risk losing the value of the full skating experience)
2. hang out with yr dog (always an option, but more so when winter is suddenly here and yr pet conveniently has more fur than you and is therefore a mobile blanket for yr personal cuddling enjoyment)
3. go sledding (enough said)
4. post on blogs, or better yet, make witty comments on my blog post
5. stuffing (the turkey and the stocking)
most importantly:
6. hang out with me at mercury and drink espresso, or cappucinos, or if you must, a latte or two. i'm accumulating points to cash in for my mario kart character.

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Happy December to you all! With the holidays hovering over us, we scramble around trying to figure out what to present as a present. How 'bout a gift certificate for your favourite coffee shop? But wait... Hold on! In addition to the usual $5 and $10 Mercury Espresso Bar Gift Certificates, we'll be selling cerificates for our first in a series of Coffee Education and Cupping Classes. For $60 you can get that caffeine crazed friend or family member one of 10 spots open on Tuesday January 26, 2010 at 7pm. The course will include a journey that takes you from the cherry to the cup. We'll be discussing growing and harvesting, processing(and how each process is integral to the cup), and of course a tasting! We'll sample 6 coffees prepared in 3 different ways. Not to mention a few interesting tidbits along the way. Of course you'll also take some top notch coffee home with you as well. You can share your new found knowledge with anyone who'll listen. Come on down and let us know how many you want and we'll hook you up. Again, the date of the first class is Tuesday January 26, 2010 @ 7pm. We'll be doing a regular series of these classes and each time we'll focus on coffees that are in season at that time. Can't wait to see you there!

Saturday, November 28, 2009

miss your momma?
why not come in for one of ajs warm breast milk lattes..
fresh.. hot.. welcoming... like mommys love
combined with our rwanden feature..
everyone wins
even yer mom

Thursday, November 26, 2009

dear leslieville
could someone please help aj administer a coffee aenima? i hear its REAL healthy
especially if you enjoy the smokey jasmine hues of yirgacheffe...
ims gonna be clean as a whistle!
is it wrong to make love to my americano? pucker up black cat
ajs in the mood for LOVE

Thursday, November 12, 2009


I got to thinking about 20 minutes ago when I was asked to write a blog about something that's been on my mind for a while now. Something that every barista has experienced; Silence. Silence, as we all know can be like a warm toilette over the face, or it can be a maddening prison where all of our perverted thoughts run rampant in our ever-so-derranged minds... wait, you guys don't have derranged minds? Don't bullshit me... Anyway, let's get started.Really? Are you some kind of Moron?

Perhaps the most irksome request asked of a barista nowadays (none-"why-bother" drink request) is the "could you please turn the music down?" question. Admittedly, sometimes people do get carried away, but come on, SLAYER IS LIKE MOZART! This is obviously and stance of the barista protecting themselves from POST-TRAUMATIC STRESS SYNDROME by using noise as a distraction from TERRIBLE 'NAM FLASHBACKS.


But really... are they? What some people don't understand is that Silence does exist in the loud coffee environment, and it is not all unwelcomed. It isn't a desolate, baron, antarctica-like silence, but rather a staggered silence throughout the day. These staggered silences are usually the result of someone lifting the needle off of the turntable so that it makes that "RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRURRRRPPPP" sound. It's kind of like listening to early hip-hop once every three hours for about 10 seconds. 10 Seconds of in-between-ness (Fig 1a).

(fig 1a) As you can see, silence is distributed evenly and fairly throughout the day. It is also green.

This is an instance of when complete silence is totally and wholeheartedly embraced. More are embodied in the list that follows:
  • Early mornings when you just want to be left alone, with your thoughts (Why am I up this early? Where am I? This hangover sucks.)
  • After DEATH METAL FRIDAYS 1-3pm when people are done assaulting you with torches and pitchforks accusing you of satanism.
  • When we are closed
  • At inopportune moments when you are trying to insult a jerk behind his back
  • oh wait that last one shouldn't be on here.



Charizard is my FAV!

Friday, October 16, 2009




Friday, October 09, 2009

Hey internet world, this is Matt coming at you from the real world. The very real world. In fact I am writing from the 'desert of the real' in the movie the matrix.

mercury in what is actually the year 2020

I know what you're thinking, 'cause right now I'm thinking the same thing. Actually, I've been thinking it ever since I got here: Why, oh why, didn't I take the BLUE pill?
You know, I know this espresso doesn't exist. I know that when I put it in my mouth, the Matrix is telling my brain that it is juicy and delicious. After nine years, you know what I realize?

Ignorance is bliss.

and that's it for moi!
Go Addy!

Ugh Matt Davey. I'm so glad that guy is gone for the day. Always showing me up with his prettier latte art and stuff. I guess I'm just lucky to work alongside Matt. This has, after all, always been my dream. No, not to be Matt. Brewing exceptional bean oil!

I still recall being a wee lass, so wee I could still fit into the top shelf of a shopping cart, cruisin' through the aisles with my Ma, as if grocery shopping wasn't, in fact, a huge chore (everything was exciting back then, eh?...). Our favourite part was always inhaling the scents of freshly ground coffee in the coffee aisle. Seriously, I didn't even drink coffee back then but my addiction had already begun, from the very first time I took in the simple smell of "alright" coffee. My journey has led me here, and I am so grateful. Barista-ing with cool dudes like Matt Davey, I give thanks, on this weekend of Thanksgiving (unless you're from Amerikuh and don't know when Thanksgiving is), for mindblowing coffee and lovely people to make it for me!

So if you, like my young self shown above, are heavily addicted to the smell of coffee beans, come indulge! Bask in the glory of a legal drug for only a few dollars.

Friday, October 02, 2009

So, as you all know, I've been working here a long time and my blog entries have been, for the most part, on the abstract-eye-bleeding-sore-causing-mind-hemorrhaging side. So let me take it down a notch for you guys and maybe blow your mind for real this time. I'm going to try and draw upon the parallels between two of my favourite things and the battles in my mind that ensue between them. Yeah, you guessed it. It's the match of a lifetime. It's




So both of these things take a long time to learn. When I started at mercury, it took me at least three months before Matt let me go behind bar, but guess what coffee world, you know how long it takes before you can get "behind the bar" in the falconry world? According to Ontario Field Ornithologists it takes TWO YEARS. So matt, who is stronger? You or a falcon?


Yeah, that's what I thought.

Round two: Extraction time.
To prove I'm not completely biased towards falconry I'm setting up this category which should be an easy win for espresso. Generally, most people who order espresso drinks are impatient and demand a short wait. Luckily, your favourite little brown liquid comes out in 25-30 seconds, (unless you're an Italian guy and your drink comes out even faster). Unfortunately, the gestation period for a falcon is 30 days, or approximately 2592000 seconds. In 2592000 seconds you could make 86400 shots of espresso. So there you go espresso, you win one by the numbers.


Lighting round:
How much caffeine does it take to kill you? Approximately 7500mg.
How many falcons does it take to kill you? Approximately 1.
1 point falconry.
A common practice for elevating a cup to bring it closer to the porta-filter during extraction is putting a ramekin under it.
A common practice before elevating your bird of prey to the skies and ordering it to kill a small mammal is putting a LEATHER GAUNTLET UNDER IT.
1 point falconry.
Espresso has cool nicknames like 'spro, the brown swallow, shart etc...
Falcons have cool nicknames like raptors, life devastators and flying death machines
1 point falconry.
You can drink espresso
You can't drink a falcon
1 point espresso
You can share an espresso based beverage with a friend.
If you share your falcon, your falconry license will be revoked, and your falcon will rain hate-death down upon you.
1 point espresso
Espresso being a colonial commodity was probably a part of the instigation of many wars.
No one fights wars for falcons except for nature conservationists, and those guys are generally lame hippies.
1 point espresso

And thus concludes the lightning round. So wait a minute, what? The outcome denotes a TIE!? What?! I was writing this as a kind of aptitude test to see what I would do with my future.
The solution between this tense conflict is evident. We need to cross the bridge between these age old institutions. I suggest we combine espresso and falconry to create the penultimate, delicious, deathmachine industry. We can have these shops all over the country, people will live in fear of the gazing hawk and it this fear will invariably make them enjoy their espressos as if it were there last. And the falcons, if they drank the espresso, I'm sure they'd become even more vicious and effective at killing. We can call it Falconresso or maybe Espralconry! What do you guys think?

Can this,

Coexist with this?

On second thought, maybe not.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Hairshirt Fracture

I'm feeling like I'm waiting on a train
By the sounds from my bed I think somebody's bled
All over something someone's keeping clean

I don't need anything, just make it bright
then turn it low
You don't need more than me
You could live right there beneath the stairs
I've done it, I've said all I can, I've reached the end
Now you must learn to bend
Bend to the floor, taste the core

You're not going nowhere
leave the money right there
I feel the arrow sticking in my ear
We owe so much we pawned
Now watch the power come undone
I'm standing on my head to watch the day just drift away
This city always makes the same mistakes, asleep or awake

I'm sick of waking up inside white balloons
Inside of blue balloons

New York air is sweet tonight
there's no stars but that's all right
I'm breathing

I feel you through your fear
Pull the arrow from my ear
Tonight we'll take a different way home
They say the fire burns but won't consume
But it does consume

You're slick, you shoplift
What's left of my brain
You haven't changed
This city always makes the same mistakes,
it's just like me
It always breaks in two
I'm sick of me for being sick of you
We'll take a gypsy cab to heaven or hell
Time will tell

RIP Jim.
8.1.1949 - 9.11.2009

Monday, September 07, 2009

There's another Doug Tiller. He's alive and well and living in Toronto. He came by looking for our Doug Tiller today. Doug Tiller, Doug Tiller is coming for you!

Sunday, September 06, 2009

Thursday, September 03, 2009

"If the barista gives you a take-out cup without asking first you better take it out." -unknown

It was 2006 and Mercury was still finding it's footing in this new and upcoming (back when this actually meant that) Leslieville neighborhood. A small group of baristas found themselves with an opportunity to push the boundaries of customer service in a quaint cafe with a product superior enough to warrant more respect traditionally given in this field. Humor was employed in place of retaliation which could sometimes go either way.

Customer: Excuse me. Excuse ME! You are OUT of toilet paper!

Mike: Oh sorry about that.

Customer: This is unacceptable.

Mike: So it was a drip dry was it?

Customer:....well... How DARE YOU! (storms out)

Mike: Too much?

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

from atop the precipice he wrote such loving prose/a shame he had to fall from grace/he landed none too gracefully/there were many who said his last words were spoken aloud as he crashed down the mountain side/most disagreed/they said his last words were typed/what follows is an artist's rendering of both/the spoken & the writ/

eureka/a little piece of the recipe for disaster was located locked and tangled upon this precipice on which i sit/a mad dash of snow down the hills toward the township above/below/added up/subtraction/retracting winter's breath down my neck/such a benevolent poet laureate was he that i was allowed to usurp the throne at widow's peak/and thrown he was to me as i was to the winds of change/a failure no less than a century young/more than a few lyrical quotes came to mind in those final days of mine/welcome/go back/goodbye/jump they said/the choice was their own/

never would i see the usurped again/lost in the mundane was he/precipitating all was a need to know/it led me here/to words of wisdom disguised in verse/labyrinthine in nature and made impossible to solve by the masses/hence my sitting here/ever more/chances are even they will try some day/try most likely to reach the same conclusions that i and the noble man before reached/too many ingredients were needed to truly get to the truth/the ever sought after/endless bounds/for me just another chapter/for them gospel/

hey ho come have a coffee @ mercury espresso bar!!!!!!!!1!!

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Hey everyone! I'm Chris, the new guy. I'm 25 and taurus. This is my first time working East of Spadina. I aspire to make you a damn good coffee.

Wednesday, August 05, 2009

Listen up GUYS! There's a new kid in town! I won't tell you who, but let's just say his name is "little Mikey." He's drippy, hot and delicious. Okay, okay, ya got me, Little Mikey is actually our new featured single origin espresso- Brazil Santo Antonio Estates. Give it a try, you won't be disappointed. Full in flavour, and encompassing a wide spectrum of acidity, this espresso will dance on your tongue like a pack of pop-rocks. All the more, it is balanced by a subtle fruit undertone. UNDERTONE! this is as nerdy as I get so I need to weigh out the rest of this entry with some STUPID IMAGES!!!


me blogging at mercury espresso bar back in '92

my beloved pet lizard doris!

Thursday, July 30, 2009



"I'd buy that for a dollar!"


Well, that Matt is a tough act to follow... So I'm the newest member of the blogging team, Addy... Adrien. I have been informed that without the production of this blog, I lose my job. So here I am, enjoying the breeze of the fan that is the extent of our air conditioning in this fine establishment.
Today, I spent my afternoon on my hands and knees organizing beneath the counter (you guys don't even want to know...), but my hopes are high that after this I can steam some dish soap water!! This is what it takes, boys and girls, to achieve status in the Barista world.
On the bright side, through the blood-drawing, blister-causing hazing, I get to enjoy the finest espresso money can buy. Take it from me, I don't even really work here!

Friday, July 17, 2009

It has come to my attention quite recently that there was some slandering going on in the Mercury Blog. I would like to take this opportunity to express my apologies for this unfortunate event. The opinion expressed had to do with a local roaster. These opinions are in no way reflective of points of view of Mercury Espresso Bar. We are very supportive of anyone within the specialty coffee industry. It is an amazing industry with amazing people. People who all have the same idea as to where we need to be headed; forward and as a community. Again, as for the parties refered to in the blog, I apologize for this.
Matthew Taylor
Co-Owner - Mercury Espresso Bar

Friday, July 10, 2009


You know what I'm talking about- the heat!

"But Matt, how are you going to write a blog about heat when this is an espresso blog?"

Well how about I answer your question with another question:


To be honest, I never really wanted to write about the heat, it is just that Doug asked me to write a blog today and i forget what he told me to write about so I figure that if I just write enough words it will come back to me... IN AN AWESOME WAVE TORRENT SPLASH!


Our good ol' faithful buddy Neil, the barista, will be competing in the good ol' regional barista championships. These things are SERIOUS. They start on July 19th! If Neil takes the cake in this comp' he'll move on to the nationals which are held in Vancouver this year. CAN YOU IMAGINE NEIL ON THE WEST COAST? IT'D LOOK LIKE THIS, PROBABLY (See image below)

(this is not Neil)


Anyway, if Neil wins the nationals he'll be competing in the Barista WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS in LONDON ENGLAND... Come on, this is a big deal because we all know Neil likes to mock the English with a phony accent, and this is maybe going to be his only chance to actually MOCK THEM IN PERSON AND ALSO DEFEAT THEM IN A COFFEE COMPETITION!!!

prepare to have that smug look espresso-ed off yo face, beeyatch

So let's wish that little guy some luck! He's an underdog! He's a sleeper hit! He's a buddy for all of us! He's like Teddy Ruxpin meets Gene Simmons! He's like Bea Arthur on a motorcycle!

Wish for his freedom, I want the Nile. Wish for the Nile- NEIL!

Tuesday, June 30, 2009


I'm Robin. I"ve been working down at Queen Mercury for, let's say, a while, and this is my first blog. What can I say, I'm not a blogger. I'd be categorized as techno-unsavvy, I don't even really know how to download music. Seriously. So instead of this computer mumbo-jumbo, come in, have a chat, bring me a mix CD, and we've still got the Brazil Varghina Sul de Minas so have a shot, it's tasty.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Hello Babies, my name is Katie. I never blog. Really. I've been working here since September and I"ve never written a blog. I guess I am just a shy guy.

So anyway.

This weekend is NXNE, right? It's only Friday and I'm totally tired. I'm a pretty lucky guy though working at Mercury Espresso Bar...this morning Neil pulled me a shot of the single origin Brazil that he is using in the competition and it really made my tired guy blues melt away. Maybe if you're lucky he will give you some of it too. I dunno.

If not we've got a bunch of other good stuff! You know about it!


Monday, June 01, 2009

Hi everyone,
This is lil' slugger here to tell you that Mercury Espresso Bar has once again been nominated for the illustrious Krups Kup of Excellence Award. In previous years, judges who knew very little about espresso would come into all the coffee joints in all of Canada (even all of the different Tim Hortons) and, well, judge us - harshly (nah, just kiddin' they were nice).


This year they're expanding beyond the Krups Kremlin and allowing the masses to decide who has the best espresso. That's right, you! The people! You can do it!

You can even vote for us if you like!
The Krups website is ! Follow instructions there if you like us!

Wednesday, May 27, 2009






Wednesday, May 20, 2009

One of the following statements is not true:

I saw a Colonel Sanders look-alike walking down the street today pushing a baby in a stroller.

Steven Seagal came in today and ordered a iced-soy latte. Pansy.

The SWAT team is swarming Jilly's right now. Curiously, we see many Dark Horse customers come through here.

We will soon have raspberry sparkling lemonade. We will also host more high-school students.

Ice-cream and beer was a bad idea last night.

What is the Leslieville Cheese Shop doing on Queen West? (Okay, it's not much of a statement but come on!)

Robin's hair gets really hot in the sun.

"Dogs are forever in the push-up position." -Mitch Hedberg

The other night someone puked up a screamo band all over my living room.

Luigi is totally the gay brother.

Matt Davey is now a record producer.

It smells like summer.

Being cute doesn't work all the time.

Doug Hayter is now the cheese master.

Monday, May 18, 2009

"Buzz, your girlfriend, woof!"

Hay guyz.
It's the may 24 weekend!
That dusty, ol' battle-axe QUEEN VICTORIA would have wanted you to come to this establishment and drink some sclading hot bean oil (maybe, actually she was probably partial to tea).
come see me (matt).
taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa taaaaaaaaaaaa!

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Buncha wackos in here today (us)!

come try our rad new feature bean: Brazil VARGHINA Sul De Minas.




Sunday, May 10, 2009

Yo buddies.
it is the day where we say how much we care about our moms. We often forget about how important they are, but you know, I find myself thinking about other neglected dudes too.

What about moths? Do they get mothers day?

and what about mammoths? mammothers day?

and what about the ice planet from Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back; Hoth? Hothers Day?

In these modern times where no stone is left unturned in the name of civilization and science, why have we not realized all that is important to us, as well as our mothers? I think that today would be greatly enhanced if I were riding around on a moth covered mammoth on Hoth. Maybe I could wrap my tow-cable around an AT-AT or something, instead of getting lame flowers for my mom.