Captain's Blog, Star Date 29082007:

It has been four days now since I, Neil Rankin, landed on this little planet known as Mercury, the closest one can get to the sun without catching aflame. At first I thought I would need my spacesuit to survive on this terrain made up of espresso and milk, how peculiar it was to discover that I needed no oxygen tank to breathe in this climate.

I find the habitants to be most friendly and very approachable (which is a giant step for mankind compared to the last planet I found myself on). Upon leaving the bubble of my Foxfire space shuttle I encountered a remarkable being known as Alex Tran, he showed me how to use the natural resources of his home planet. I have not been the same since.

Knowing now that I can live off of what this planet has to offer I'm sure I will find myself very happy indeed. I think I'll stay awhile. I look forward to meeting all of Mercury's other inhabitants and realizing the full potential of the planet Mercury.

End Transmission.

blog blog
blog blog


hey sports fans! If you come in and see a new face behind the counter it might just be Mr.Neil Rankin!
Do you know Neil Rankin?
If not, here is your chance!

In other news...
Beans Beans Beans
I'm really keen for these beans.
The Mad Hatter Blend- The best cure for your AM blues! It's got a little extra kick to get your morning started. Think about it... After a cup of that stuff you could look and feel as great as Alice Berg! ooohh baby!
Quick Silver- It's like Ben, but in bean form. Awake but not crazy, not too in your face, and super eco friendly. Great anytime, anywhere.
Espresso- Great as a brew, perfect as an espresso. It's like when Adrian found $20.00 in the street and took me out for ice cream.
Decaf (swp)- Best decaf around! It's like missing a party for a great night of sleep. Sure the party might be fun (especially if I'm there), But sleep is so RAD!
Extra Butter- It's dark, it's rich, and it's awesome. The guy upstairs buys it all the time. I'm Sold!
Ethiopia Yirgacheffe- It's sweet, a bit fruity, and a staff favourite. Great after a meal.

Over and Out
- al ICEBERG

OK, one parting gift. In honour of our new Quicksilver blend, I give you vintage Kevin Bacon in a film of the same title:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GWOCxj_qvoI

It is with a heavy heart that I, Nicholas Brown, pen this blog on my last day of employment at the Merc. I'm moving on, but my heart remains with this beacon of light in the burgeoning Toronto coffee scene. It's been about a year since I moved here from Vancouver, and I'm happy to say that this young shop has made a huge impact in a city where orders of "expresso" are still a regular phenomenon (though not here-- our customers are a cut above).

I may live in Parkdale, but I'll still be making the regular bike ride across Lakeshore to visit, sip a cappuccino and stoop it (that is, until Winter rears its ugly head).

So fare thee well young Mercury. It has been a pleasure.

Today Mercury Espresso Bar welcomes young Damien Zielinski to the fold- the latest in a hallowed lineage of lucky employees. He was reportedly heard to remark "this is, perhaps, the greatest day of my young life." With unstoppable vigour and an enthusiasm impossible to deny, he has surely embarked on a life-changing and irreversible transformation process.

"I used to work for a Starbucks on campus," said Zielinski, 25, "and you better believe it was a different scene. When you're used to serving McEspresso to University of Toronto slaves all day on behalf of a multi-national corporation, it's amazingly refreshing to begin serving a product you believe in to people you respect (and on behalf of people you respect). I look forward to approaching Mercury's Elektra with an attitude of humility, diligence, reverence, and love that will hopefully manifest itself in delicious shot after delicious shot of organic Fair Trade espresso. I take this position and the positivity that it allows me to spread in the Leslieville community very seriously, and plan on working very, very hard."

Back when the Hudson's Bay Company (a private business) owned most of Canada and 'venture capital' was counted in beaver pelts, suffering for fashion was an everyday business. All those beavers found their way, eventually, into hats-- fuzzy, felted top hats. It took a special kind of hatter to process the pelts, to remove the hard, spiny hairs using mercury-- a toxic element-- day after day after day. As we now know, mercury (the element) is something that we don't want to have too close or prolonged contact with (I'm contrasting this, of course, with the establishment of the same name whose blog you are perusing, where you want to be all the time, obviously.)

The long-term effects of mercury were known back then but tolerated due to the lack of any other effective way of treating the furs. Those few who practiced this process slowly started to show the symptoms of mercury poisoning: drooling, sweating, and general dementia. They are best remembered in Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland, in the form of the Mad Hatter.

But humanity has had a much longer relationship with mercury due to its perceived magical properties, which were readily seen in its liquid state at room temperature. Alchemists prized this integral tool, using it liberally in their studies of transmutation, and quacks dosed their patients with this miracle cure, the solution to all cases of syphilis, cancer, mumps, flu, plague, pox, ticks, lice, demon possession, and general wifely disagreeability. This was the power of Quicksilver.

Hey, it's a darn good day for a good ol' cup of espresso. Y'all should try it in a ceramic cup, considering paper ain't all that great of a seasoning.

C'mon down y'all.

Hi. Did you miss me?

Taste of the Danforth is in full effect this weekend leaving Leslieville a desolate wasteland. Well, wasteland is kind of an exaggeration but that IS the theme of this blog.

We've got a Mexico Oaxaca Sierra Madre Del Sur for our Featured Latte. It makes me feel like wearing a poncho. No one can be in a bad mood while wearing a poncho. I was thinking of getting sombrero too. Imagine that! Having a sombrero/poncho combo, I'd be off my tits in happiness!

Mercury is also out on the hunt for a few good baristas. If you know anyone who has prior espresso bar experience we'd be happy to meet them!

Ghostface Killah is blasting from the stereo right now and Doug and I agree that he's the best Wu-Tang member. If Doug was a member it would be him. I think I would be Redman. Which member would you be? Ten points for anyone owning up to be ODB!

love,

a

Alice: OH! Well hello there, I didn't see you come in. Let me just put on something a little bit more....

Matthew, Sasha, and I are just hanging out here - I guess we are "working" not "hanging" but "whatever". If you'd like to join in on the fun you know where to find us.

NEW NEWS!
We now have biodegradable lids! So once you have had your fix you can toss the WHOLE CUP into the green bin. AWESOME! Oh and a little reminder, if you bring in your own cup we take 25 cents off. We don't have to use a cup, you get a deal, it's win win!
well anyway, Green Shift says the cups take about 50days to break down. I say you test them. Not that I think they are liars or anything (because I don't), just that it might be sort of cool to see if its true.

Sasha: Hi! We at Mercury are also excited to announce that we are implementing a new method: The PK Dosing & Tamping Method. Pioneered (sort of) by Matthew Taylor, this should cut down on coffee waste, increase shot consistency, and elicit fascination, confusion, and crypto-mockery. It's all we talk about. That and our lids. We blogged about them the other day, and then again today. We're really excited. We might blog about them tomorrow. Stay tuned.

Oh, and we've got some delicious Ethiopia Harrar in as our feature; it has earned the coveted and rare thumbs-up from Alice Berg. Not just any coffee gets the Alice Berg thumbs-up.

-S and A

Hi, internet!

Woah, it's hot today. I know that it's been hot before, and that I've frequently written about it being hot, but woah is it ever hot. Woah. I expected my morning cappucino to spontaneously combust, and when I ran out for ice today, I felt as if I was going to melt into the pavement. However, at Mercury, we are not dissuaded by the heat - we consider it a test of our dedication and our incredible tanned physiques.

For clarity's sake: Our retail beans are now being stored and ground behind the counter. This will result in less delightful Three Stooges-style blundering, and it's really a better setup in all respects.

Also, we now have biodegradable lids! How exciting is that? SO EXCITING! Everything that your coffee comes in can be tossed in the green bin now. Well done, GreenShift!

Come sweat it out and biodegrade with us. We would like that.

-Sasha

Behind the counter stand Alice and Sasha; friendly, helpful, prompt, occasionally sarcastic. Filters in hand, fingers at the register, ducking in and out of the dishwasher, they are prepared to serve you a variety of delicious beverages.

But beware: When the night comes, or when the store empties, they become scurrilous rogues. They give each other makeshift tattoos behind the lemons, air guitar with unprecedented ferocity, and sashay about like a pair of trapeze artists.

Come and order our coffee, and marvel at the quality of our work and the seamless nature of our public personae. But all the while, remember that underneath lurks something primal, something savage, something else.

-Sasha, who read Where The Wild Things Are like three times last night.

VERSUS BLOG POST -- SASHA VERSUS BEN

Round One: Ben

The Scene: Mercury Espresso Bar, Saturday afternoon. A bustling day; the scent of fresh espresso is in the air, the buzz of anticipation of caffe latte, cappuccino, and americano presides.

Ben: Hark, on the horizon! It is Matthew, carrying divers delectables! Prithee, who is it who rides with him?

Alice: It is not who, Sirrah, but what! Could it be? A Mazzer Major! The Grinding Grail!

Matthew: Yea, it be true, one to join the other we have already collected upon our travails. With two, we shall be nigh unstoppable.

Yes, friends, two Mazzers; Speed, Power, and Flavour are with our heroes. Come and see them rejoicing and frolicking, grinding fine coffees and pulling impeccable shots.

Round Two: Sasha

I am here in the warm, comforting environs of Mercury, with a song in my heart, a twinkle in my eye, and espresso on my lips. (This doesn't look as good as it sounds.) We also have a new sign above the door; for maximum enjoyment, order your cappucino, stand in the doorway, sidle a couple of feet to the right, look up, and bask, then come in to enjoy your coffee. (This looks just as good as it sounds.)

As for coffee, you're in luck, as we're featuring the ever-popular Yemen as our feature bean, which unfailingly offers a smooth, rich cup of coffee. Also, for espresso, we're featuring the perhaps-even-more-popular Kid O, which is powerful and rich enough to knock a man down at fifty paces, yet just as smooth as Alex Tran. Alex Tran on a good night. Alex Tran on a good night, with the moon above him, shining just so, stretching his arms to yawn and seamlessly loop an arm around your shoulder.

It's pretty good, I guess.

-Sasha


ROUND THREE BEN GRINDS ESPRESSO IN GRINDER HAHAHAHA HE WINS

Hello. If you aren't doing anything Monday night and you're feeling a little high strung, come out for a bike ride with us. We're going to meet here at around 9pm and bomb around the city for about an hour. Where we're going has yet to be determined but the more the merrier! And maybe we can turn this to be a weekly thing!

alex

Well kids... the day has come... WE HAVE LEMONS!!! Big deal, I know. I will go to the store to by ice, and then we will be open for business (lemonade business I mean).

Adrian slept in today so I called our dear friend Ben over to help me out. Here is what he has to say:

He says nothing because he disappeared into thin air after consuming 10 espressos in a row. I thought I saw a brown blur whiz by and catch a cup falling off the counter but I can't be sure if that was him. I guess I'll find out what happened to him when I see him on Saturday. Peas out

What the heck is this? Is this rain? It doesn't feel like it? If you stand really still it feels like the rain is rising up from the ground and floating sideways, creeping towards you like dirty old man. This kind of weather really gets me down. I love a good rain fall but this is something else. Is it mist? Fog? It's cheating us out of our summer sun is what it is. Kitties hate this weather too! It's impossible for them to avoid something they can't see.
Mercury, however, is dry. Dry and inviting. Come in we can talk about bikes. I LOVE talking about bikes. Maybe it's because there's so much I don't know. Biking around in Toronto gives one lots to chat about. So if you're sick of getting soaked by mystery rain today, stop by for a coffee.

We still have no Lemons. Because of this we have no lemonade. Pro Organics is inspecting them right now, and once they pass the perfection test, they will be carried over on the backs of giant owls. Because of this, fact, they will arrive in the night time and be here in the morning. Sorry. I miss our lemonade too.

I'm not trying to get your hopes up... we will not at any point be serving hot dogs, hot doug's, or beef patties.. but I thought I would share this image with you. If ever you find yourself in Chicago I say go to Hot Doug's The Sausage Superstore and
Encased Meat Emporium and pick up a real one.

Matthew and I are working today, and then in comes eve for the night shift... so if you feel like chillin' out... just saying.

A bunch of us went out to see the Final Fantasy/ Do Make Say Think show Sunday night. It was really Rad! It was quite windy, but I think the wind made the show sound even better. I also have to point out that our little buddy Sasha might know everyone in the world! ok, maybe not the world... but he sure does know a lot of people. If you want to make the long list of people who know Sasha come on into Mercury.

That's how I roll
- Ali bear and M dog

Hey Kids,
If you haven't packed up and left town you can always come hang out at Mercury.
we have got lots of treats to eat like


-Banana, Apple cinnamon, and sunflower zucchini Bran muffins
-Spiced Brownies
-ginger or chocolate chip cookies

We have a new artist hanging this month. Her name is Renee Nault. She is cool. They are cool too. We like her. There are goats. Lots of goats and goat like things. I like them. They are cool.

The Feature Latte of the week is the Ethiopia Yirgacheffe. If you have tried it before you know that it is awesome...
and if you haven't I really think you need too.
I like it... just saying.

It reminds me of this one time...
I was walking with Adrian on Queen west, and he was all like "you are the best!" and I was all like "No, You are the best!" and then we went on for like 10 min talking about who really was better....
So it's like that in a latte. Your latte will keep telling you "YOU are the best!" and you will say to your latte "No, YOU are".

That's how I roll
- A "Wall" Berg

"Doing dishes is like breathing."

-Amber Roga-Fox 4:01 pm June 20th

Hi internet! It's a deliriously hot summer day here at Mercury. It is throughout Toronto, I imagine. But I couldn't tell you. We're handling it though, Alice is sipping some basil lemonade, I have a smoothie, we're doing calisthenics, we're making iced coffee, it's getting okay.

Our patio is a real thing now! Before, it was just an imagined social construct based on a haphazard outdoor arrangement of tables and chairs. Now, it has a fence around it. You can come by and sip your cappucino on it and feel all the more cozy and secure. Try it. You'll like it.

Also, I'm officially letting the public know that as self-appointed Mercury Organic Espresso Bar Chess Champion, I am taking on all comers. If anyone successfully contests my title, they will be rewarded with fame, bounties of fresh fruit, and maybe a laurel wreath (or a pigeon trophy if Ben crashes into one that day). Let me know. I'll defend my title anytime, anywhere; and by that I mean at Mercury, when I finish my shift, if I haven't gone skipping off somewhere.

Really, why aren't you stopping by? Stop by.

Love always,
-Sasha