Dear Amber,

I woke up to a phone call today requesting my presence at the Mercury because one of our beloved barista's was not feeling quite himself. I raced down here knowing that a delicious cup of of Bali Paradise Valley and it's peanut buttery goodness would be waiting for me here, with you as well. In no time, (well more like an exciting 18mins) I got down here but alas, no blond bombshell was anywhere in sight. A handsome, young, upstart, instead, was here to greet me (as well as the morning horde) as I proceeded to begin my morning, the same way I ended my night last night. Perhaps we'll meet again in an espresso bar out west, when we're both too tired to make it all the way east. Maybe we'll cross paths when the sun's smile is visible, the bird's singing can be heard, and the buds on the trees start peaking out. I'll be waiting on a green, plastic patio chair with a cold one waiting for us on the table, behind the delivery truck, right by the main road where we used to sit and make fun of the folks that saunter by, oblivious to the fact they're being laughed at. I can almost see it.

~missed connection #1269389~

I think it is perfectly reasonable, and in fact natural, to want to hang out with a monkey. Our close cousins have much to teach us. So I will pose the age old question, one which has plagued humankind for centuries. Great minds: philosophers, mathematicians, astrologers, anthropologists, have all weighed in on the matter and now it's your turn.
Would you rather spend one hour with three hired priests OR spend three hours with a hired monkey?
An inside tip puts a hired monkey at a rate of $1500.00 an hour. "Sure is a lot of money" you say, but in retrospect the New Yorker with a dirty little secret paid $2500.00 more per hour for his lady than he would have for a monkey. "How does this relate to coffee?" you ask -- boy you sure are an inquisitive little fellow aren't you!-- Nothing! it has nothing to do with coffee. But one of the benifits of going to a coffee house is to get out of the house and socialize. So here it is. We're making it very easy for you. Come down. Join the rest of us, forget the hustle and bustle, and sit down and practice the art of conversation.
As you sit you have a plethora of options when it comes to a tasty beverage.
ON PRESS- we've got the Cruz del Sur (Peru) and the Flecha Roja (Costa Rica).
FEATURE LATTE- The wondrous Bali is back. Bali Paradise Valley * a noise which suggests salivation. (Or salvation, depending on how strongly you feel about beans).
BARISTA- Neil, Damien, and Alice (soon joined by Alex). What's not to like?

Batman & Robin
Starring Alice Berg and Neil Rankin.

SYPHON? More like SY-PHUN! Or...FUN! SY-FUN!

So, yes I am talking about syphons. Why, I hear you all asking out from behind your laptops in your respective homes, well I'll tell you why. It's because some of you may have seen Matt "experimenting" with some Bunsen burners and syphons recently. Don't worry, we're not planning on blowing anything up...it's really nothing like that, we're just trying to bring you the best cup of coffee possible and that takes a little experimentation. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tkOCKbEj-vQ&feature=related

For further information on this fascinating subject of coffee syphoning stop on by and ask one of us friendly baristas we'll gladly tell you about it. Matthew and i are thinking about taking our chances with the Yirgacheffe and brewing up a batch this afternoon. If you're here we'll share. Promise.

You're so suave.

Oh, don't be so modest, you know you are.

Alice and I were just talking about you. You really ought to come in more, and tell us about what you're doing these days. You're always up to such cool stuff.

I wish you came to our party on Saturday. It's always so much fun when you come-- we laugh and laugh and laugh... I remember that party you threw back in '86-- when you hired that magician to dress up like Brett 'The Hit Man' Hart? I cherish that memory, and to this day, I have retained a napkin to better recall the experience:

I guess what they say is true-- you'll always have the memories. And in my case I also have the tattoo. People say I'm crazy, but I say "it's worth it!"

Well I'm just taking it easy these days. Real Slow. Nice and Lazy. Don't care much for show boatin' around town. Can you believe we got Mercury T-Shirts?! Brown or Army Green. It says 'I care about coffee but i also care about fashion' in a 'i haven't lost my cool' sorta way. Yeah, and at $20.00 a pop that's pretty much all I'm wearing these days. Other shirts- who needs 'em, you know. I like to just sit around in my Merc shirt and drink the Feature Ethiopia Yirgacheffe. Gets ya going in a chocolaty rich comforting sort of way. Precious like a kitten.

So why not come by? The first one's on me (But then we're gonna gouge ya).

So Mercury celebrated it's 2nd year on Saturday and boy did I get some shots.

Of course what's a birthday without cake.
Or a few friendly faces...




Even a dog wanted to get in on the action.

Our Baristas were hard at work.




Now we enter the terrible twos.


Some couldn't get it quite right.


Doug had enough of all the goofing around.

Ah what the heck?

Everyone went back to doing what they do best. Thanks to Graham, Adrian, Cameron, and Kurt for the musical treats!

Jakey and Trish say, "See you around!"

Cold Cake & Hot Coffee.
"G'afternoon! Welcome back! Here we are, the day after our fabulous second birthday, standing tall with cold cake in one hand and hot coffee in the other. "

So says Neil Rankin. But he's gone now and you're left with me.

My account of yesterday:

Adrian and Cameron played a 50 ton set that led to a couple minor misdemeanor offenses. "I didn't mean to get naked, I just got caught up in the moment. After my shirt came off it was all kind of a blur and I had no idea he was a police officer." said Alice Berg after she was released on bail.

Graham Powell also nailed down a colossal set that melted the hearts and souls of all kittens and cute furry creatures within a hundred-mile radius. You're so sweet Graham it makes me so angry that I want to kiss a bunny.

No latte-art throw-downs were officially recorded but we suspect there were more than a few golden moments for our in-house superstar. You know who I'm talking about.

Neil Rankin wore loose fitting jeans.

Ben Bruneau wore loose fitting jeans.

Cameron Johnson left and came back a record 18 times. What's more shocking was that he managed to down just that many ristrettos as well. Don't worry, we took away his keys after the alleged number 10.

Ryan Gauvin was our unofficially pronounced official photographer of the day. Apparently people kept telling him how big his lens was. He took home three lucky ladies' numbers that day. It's all about confidence I tell ya.

Josh Greenhut was one of the winners of the raffle. It's really just a coincidence he spends the most time here. Really.

Damien won the election for Presidinski. All other candidates mysteriously vanished before the final count.

Rumors are floating around that an Amber Fox was lurking behind the bar yesterday morning. No confirmations will be made by this reporter yet.

The day ended with a rather emotional group hug that resulted in the second misdemeanor charge being laid that day. Specialists are being brought in for staff and friends of staff that have been affected by these atrocities.

There really has to be another occasion where the staff gets together otherwise blogs would be rather boring don't you think?

Reflecting back after two years of being open, a few things spring immediately into mind. Just to adequately prepare you for the onslaught that are my thoughts, bare in mind that my opinions are just that, my opinions.
What first comes to mind are the changes to the physical layout of the store. Remember that crusty old couch that used to sit near the washroom wall? An interesting slice of information about that was it was donated to us by a student house. No joke. I remember all the kids that used to writhe in and out of the cushions ignorant of it's origins and experiences. If only that couch could talk.
Behind the bar in our work space we used to have the grinders on the right side. The significance of this is actually quite important. For one thing we wouldn't have been able to fit that many grinders in that little space which is now taken over by our hot water dispenser (and our charming "no cell-phones-at-the-counter" sign, more on that later). But more importantly the surface that holds our current grinders didn't exist and therefore getting in and out of the bar was easier. This wasn't so great at first seeing as how many "grabby-joes" that would come in. "The espresso machine is for employee use, sir" was once upon a time a common saying. Baristas were also known for having short tempers and often jumping out from behind the bar trying to strangle customers so caging them in were also a good idea.
But we've come a long way baby! Our customer service is now somewhat streamlined into some thing that resembles an obedient, efficient, factory production line.

Come help us celebrate our second birthday this Saturday. The Mercury Goat fund will be back, and that means that a dollar from every latte will help buy a goat for impoverished families. There's going to be raffles ( of course with prizes), barista vs. barista latte art throw downs, t-shirts, Alice Bergs, live music (by our very own Adrian), and oogling of our new webpage, some tears, New Jack Swing, Donovan impressions, and perhaps some line-dancing.

Who knows what's going to happen?

Top 10 Reasons to take a break and walk over to the MERC

10) Greenhut is working away in the corner, and you know what they say about that... A Wednesday's not a Wednesday unless it's a Greenhut Wednesday. Wednesday.
9) Matthew and I would walk to see you- that is if we weren't manning the shop AND we knew where you worked AND you could hook us up with free paper clips. How do you think Trump got to where he is today? A few free paper clips go along way.
8) We've got Yemen Mocha Matari. You want Yemen Mocha Matari. And as they say in Latin "Res melius evinissent cum Coca" (Things go better with Coke.)
7) So you won't look so much like this guy




















6) James says "Get out of the house!" It may be lame, but that's how he feels.
5) David Berg.
4) Neil might do something dumb. Then you can point, and laugh, and feel better about yourself because you AREN'T Neil Rankin. Actually I love Neil, and if you're havin' a day- he is the guy to see. There couldn't be a better way to improve your mood than a little QT with The Ranks.
3) You can help Alice start The Drywall Olympics. It started as a dream and soon grew to be the largest alternative Olympics in the world! You don't want a piece?


2) We just got our shipment in from Intelligentsia. We have Beans! We've got Kid o! We've got everything you always knew you always wanted and more!
1) Best coffee in the City. Shall I go on?

This is why you should come in now.

Mercury T-Shirts go on sale, Free Cake, Live Music, The whole staff coming together for one spectacular day of funness- This is why you need to make it down for Saturday.
Or miss out and have people call you Lame.
They'll say "hey, he used to be cool" or "She just lots her edge and fell into the pit of uncool."The choice is yours.

Checkin' us out at the office, eh? Bein' productive on company time? Well, for your dedication, we've decided to reward you with this, the Link Blog. A blog of links. Links in a Blog. You can't go wrong, cause we're telling ya where to go.

For all of your coffee needs: http://darkcitycoffee.com http://www.intelligentsiacoffee.com http://www.espressoporn.com http://www.coffeegeek.com http://www.haciendaesmeralda.com/ Feeling Green? http://www.greenshift.com http://www.foodshare.net http://www.thehungersite.com

Cool Stuff. What? It is!
http://www.metalwoodcd.com
http://robertfarmerworld.com
http://grahampowell.com
http://www.dothetest.co.uk
http://youtube.com/watch?v=DtVkzgKObv0

Man, clicking all those links sure was hard work. Time for a coffee break!

Zirikana(a Kinyarwandan word meaning "show your commitment")
Walking bare-foot through the grasslands
gentle rain falls lightly on your urban sombrero
Sweet and clean tropical fruit on the tongue
lightning strikes twice and the monsoon rain consumes you
the land of one thousand hills
everlasting brown sugar
It's here
It's satisfying
It's Rwanda
Fall in love with it
-Calvin Klein



Hey Merc fans. If you aren't sick of reading about us check this out.
http://coffeegeek.com/opinions/cafestage/02-02-2008
Right on!

Come in and keep Damien company tonight. Have a press. Talk it out. Feel better. Thatswhatimsayin'
-Berg and big Z

Can you believe that I have to write a blog? But you know me, I write a crazy, razzle dazzle pazzle blog that goes nowhere with utter disregard for punctuation so that when people read it they say "woah! What's he doing writing a blog?" Anyways, it's another friday, which usually means PARTY!!!!!!!!! But as it is I have to work tomorrow at 6 A.M. for one sick Ben Bruneau (You're losing it Ben, and it shows. I've been watching you deteriorate for weeks.) Alas, in the end, the plague touched us all. Tomorrow will find Mercury, not at a loss, but with a debilitated stock of organic whole milk. The cows can't meet our growing demand for organic milk and have picketed the pasture. NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT...fact. Get here early if you're that concerned for the early bird gets the worm while the sleepyhead gets burned. It was not contained to Rome or Carthage, but was spotted in America, breeding in a compost of greed and uselessness and murder. (Shots rang out - doorang doorang ya baby ya) America go away now! Don't bother me, I'm tired of this weather and sick of how it used to be. Whatever was made of big Joey D, Betty Grable and Bugsy Ramirez? Gone again I suppose, and not to come back. That's a fact. Poor America. Tossed on a pilgrim tide. What will come to be when this world is done?

March 12th!

The first day of Spring is finally upon us! Soon the tulips will be in blossom and the grass will be green and....oh. Wait a second. March 12th? Oh, I misread that. I thought it said 21st. My mistake. Well March 12th ain't so bad, I mean we've got gray clouds, and....wet snow, and....beautiful winds reaching speeds of up to 120km/h.

So, don't put away those toques, mitts, and scarves just yet cause we got at least another couple weeks of this gorgeous weather.

What's that you say? You're feeling dePRESSed by all this heavy snow? Why not lighten your spirits with a PRESS of Yergacheffe Konga Co-op from 49th Parallel. It's blueberrific. (That's a little combo of the words blueberries and terrific for ya). Get it while it's hot! (Cause no one likes cold coffee....or do they???)

What do you think Alice Berg?........Alice?.......Berg?.......Hello?.......Helloooooooo???
-Love Neil Rankin

Check it out boys and girls, fresh off the boat, this months Toronto Life. Mercury is featured in an article regarding coffee culture in TO. That's where you live. Page 113. Hot naked photo of Ben. Well, photo of Ben (not pictured naked-- yet!). Bananas over Duran Duran they say. Love it or Leave it. You make up your own mind Mister. We'll chat about it over your morning latte.

So here it is the updates of all updates
Buttering the wheels
We're talking brain science
we're talking fresh off the boat
Hot of the cool cucumber
Elephants being the true multi-tuskers
We're talking Mercury turns 2!

Saturday March 22nd we will be doing our version of a Big League Birthday. There will be live music starting in the afternoon at around 1pm. Some of your Merc staff will be jamming and ripping it up like Neil and Adrian. Not only are they talented baristas, but they happen to be excellent musicians as well. Some people have all the luck. So you won't want to miss it! We will also be giving out Free birthday cake. Who doesn't dig that?
So look out for more updates, more bands, and more fun.

BRAINSTORM! Wouldn't it be cool if you could give out a Do Not Resuscitate card to people who are incredible jerks? Or you could slip a Medicalert bracelet on their wrist-- "DNR-- Huge Jerk". Am I right, people? Are you with me? I think it would definitely speed along the evolutionary process. Everyone call your MPs, unless you are a huge jerk.

Steve Martin would be excluded from any resultant legislation.

Have you even noticed that the Beastie Boys are always pictured with bad ass hand gestures? It's like all you need are some baggy pants and a skull cap to complete the look. I feel a theme day coming on.

Hi. My name is Neil Rankin. I have a mustache on my face. Wanna go for a ride? No, just kidding. I do that a lot. Kid around i mean... not the other thing.. you know..
wow, this is awkward!

This Friday was Fake Mustache Friday. Just another crazy theme day for your enjoyment. I'm going to go ahead and say that it was awesome. Refreshingly awesome.
So let me ask you a question: If we'd take it this far for theme days, how far will we take it for our anniversary? That question will be answered Thursday March 20th. Who knows what ace I've got up my sleeve OR if I'll be wearing sleeves at all! oh no, I've said too much. Case. Point. Fact. It'll be something to write home about.

Mud Slinging, ink pouring, deep, dark, wild west in the cool way COFFEE!
Our Feature Latte du jour is the India Monsooned Malabar, called so for the way it's prepared. The farmers leave the husked beans to dry during the Monsoon season, which means they dry really slo-o-o-wly, giving it a smoky, fermented, tangy flavour, with fruity undertones. Be bold, be brave, and have a Monsooned Latte today! At 4.75 we're practically givin' them away!

So Mr.Rankin's Band Foxfire (no Forest) was review/promoed this week in NOW magazine. We think it's pretty cool. Check it out. Congrats Neil!

As for Damien, well he's been reading and writing papers. He gets this really cute expression on his face when concentrating. Come in and see for yourself. It's like bunnies having a tea party in heaven.

As for me, I'm getting ready for a night of bowling. I've be stretching, grooving, and you know working on my skills. If you have any tips come on by. Maybe if it's slow we can practice in the store (*note to my employers- we will not be bowling in the store at any point in time tonight. No need to come by and check on me. Hey it's Berg we're talking about. No Trouble there. Really).


Hope you all have a wondrous time in the snow. Go Tobogganing! It might be your last chance! Nothing is more fun than launching yourself - full force- down a snow covered hill. Don't take me word for it. I'll have a coffee waiting for you.

over and out.

Quetzal [Ket-sahl] Breakfast Blend- The Quetzal are actually a rare type of bird. IN fact, it's the national bird of Guatemala-- When that comes up in an episode of Jeopardy you'll thank me.
This direct trade blend from Intelligentsia starts off with a creamy milk chocolate flavour, a little spice, and ends with a sparkling, crisp, and clean finish. It's a refreshing way to start your morning-- and NO, it doesn't taste like chicken!
Shower not included*.

El Cuervo Guatemala- This single origin direct trade bean will have you Cuervo-ing in your boots*. It's sweetness touches on sugar cane, red fruit, and milk chocolate. It's a bold cup with a clean finish. You'll be sure to find it invigorating-- or at the very least it'll fill you with life and energy! Maybe that was redundant or maybe just an unnecessary repetition when expressing ideas-- but i can assure you of one thing... This coffee is serious and sexy.

El Gallo Breakfast Blend- You can't spell direct trade without erect. Well you can't.
'The Gal' (as we like to call it) is sweet and fruity, smooth and rich, and bright and lively. With a hit of caramel this clean cup is a beautiful way to wake up. By the time you're done you'll be screaming "Zielinski for Presidentski!"

Los Delirios Nicaragua- Now I ask you this: Have you ever woken up in the truck of a car, bound and gagged and thought "Not again!"?
Totally unrelated to this coffee...
The Nicaragua is sweet and creamy like wild honey and caramel. It's smooth and buttery with a cranberry/baker's chocolate/allspice finish. If you haven't tried this little gem you should... or someone might end up in a trunk. Or not. You never know what will happen next in the crazy world! I may be delirious* and indecent, but I assure you the coffee is not.

So take one of these splendid blends/single origins in a half pound bag, or you can hang back, hang out and have a press. ON PRESS We have two single origins waiting to be brewed at the moment--
Kangocho- Kenya and Tres Santos- Colombia. At 5.oo +tax How can you afford not to?

OVER AND OUT!
You know I love you baby. I love you like a tyrannosaurus loves long necks.

*Jokes inspired by Neil Rankin.

So you can't sleep, you go to work with toilet paper tacked to the bottom of your shoe, and you're eating you're cereal in an ashtray... what is your life coming to?
Wipe the corners of your mouth (where the saliva and toothpaste have united), Take a brush through your hair (and your teeth for that matter), and find something to cover the mustard stain on your shirt... 'Cause today is going to be your day! Take the bull by the horns (youknowwhatimsayin') and get your act together.

Then, in a limp gesture toward Real Greatness, you wipe all the drool off your chin and say "Here I go... I'm going to Mercury!" And then everything gets better.

Since that was all subtle and literary-like, let me reword everything you just read in a language you might understand: Mercury takes the most slovenly, pathetic excuses for humans, and turns them into Rock Hard Dionysian Man-Men. It did it to me and it can do it you too!

Filling The Recorder Quota

Ryan Gauvin is a man of many tastes. He recently divulged this little nugget of information to us here at Mercury, that he LOVES the recorder. He can't get enough of it, and that's why we're listening to The Unicorns endlessly today. This record is drenched in recorder. According to Mr Gauvin, any trumpet solo can be converted into a recorder solo if you've got enough time on your hands.....

What do recorders have to do with coffee you ask? That's a question that can only be answered by popping in for a visit and finding out for yourself. There's a recorder solo and a feature latte with YOUR name on it if you act now, so come on down!

Well, it's Saturday now. Time passes and then one day you're old- go figure.

Anyway, you should probably come to Mercury right now and try our new featured bean, the Bali Paradise Valley. This one's a banger, a real favourite of the staff and the regulars, so you might say it's back by popular demand. Peanut-buttery and oh-so delicious, the Bali Paradise Valley quite literally (figuratively) puts you in a valley of paradise.... uh.. in Bali.

Indonesia regained its independence from the Netherlands in 1949, and having been also colonized by the Japanese, you might say their provincial history is as 'rich' as their coffee beans. Groovy.

Also, and possibly way huger, is the news of our upcoming anniversary. On March 20th, Mercury Espresso Bar will officially be two years old. But on Saturday March 22th, the celebration will take place. I don't really need to tell you about it, because you're GOING to be there, but here's a hint: popcorn.